


if i saw you in heaven

by helicoptersky



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Heaven, Hospitals, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-06-16
Updated: 2016-06-16
Packaged: 2018-07-15 10:56:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 549
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7219642
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/helicoptersky/pseuds/helicoptersky
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Castiel closes his eyes, concentrating on the sound of the machines grounding Dean’s mortal body. He inhales slowly, filling Jimmy’s unchanged body’s lungs with air.</p>
            </blockquote>





	if i saw you in heaven

Castiel feels the grip of Dean’s hand on his tighten. He takes one chaste moment to appreciate Dean’s smile directed at him, the other’s face already etched with lines and marks of stories unimaginable. Dean’s still brilliant green eyes shine slightly with sorrow, love, and hope all at the same time.

“I’ll see you soon, right?” Dean says with the same tone of voice he’s had for seventy-seven years.

Castiel closes his eyes, concentrating on the sound of the machines grounding Dean’s mortal body. He inhales slowly, filling Jimmy’s unchanged body’s lungs with air.

“Cas?” he feels Dean’s thumb rubbing the back of his hand in slow practiced routines. He finally opens his eyes to see Dean’s smile fade and gives Dean the best smile he could give despite the current circumstances.

“Yes, Dean,” he envelops Dean’s hand between his own, “you will.”

Dean leans further on his hospital bed and laughs slowly, “Then I don’t really see why you’re moping about me. It’s not like we won’t see each other again.”

Castiel’s smile slowly turns into a grimace, but Dean doesn’t notice with his blurry vision. “You’ll love Heaven, Dean.” he manages to say without his voice breaking.

“‘course I will. Just imagine all the pie I’d eat there… and Mom and Dad would be there, Bobby… S-sammy.” Dean still hasn’t gotten over Sam, who had died seventeen years ago on a freak accident in a solo hunting trip because Dean was officially a senior citizen.

“They’d be there,” he assures Dean. It was now his turn to grip Dean’s hand tighter.

—

They stay like that in silence for a few minutes before Tessa arrives.

“Hey, Tessa! ‘knew it would be you,” Dean winks at Tessa, “guess it’s time, huh?”

Cas nods slowly and stands up to put a light kiss between Dean’s brow.

“Come on, Cas! I’m a dying old man, might as well make out with me before I go.” Dean teases and grins. Cas obliges and slaps Dean’s cheek lightly.

“I love you,” he tells Dean.

“Of course you do! I’m adorable.” Dean replies while squeezing Castiel’s butt with his other hand.

“And also a perverted old man.”

“Damn right.”

Tessa touches Dean’s shoulder and looks at Castiel who nods.

“See you, Cas!” was Dean Winchester’s last words before he took his last breath.

The flat tone of the machine filled the morose hospital room, and it was Castiel’s cue to drop the act and break down entirely. He falls back down to his chair, gripping Dean’s lifeless cold hand close to his lips and cries.

—

Tessa comes back a few moments later.

“You never told him, did you?” she says sadly.

Castiel just continues to cry, choosing to ignore Tessa, because answering her means admitting to lying to Dean.

“You never told him that he won’t remember you in Heaven.”

His heart breaks even more. He couldn’t bear the thought of telling Dean, of breaking Dean’s heart. The only consolation he has of Dean’s death is that he died happy. He died with faith, and hope, and love; and Castiel couldn’t stomach the thought of having it any other way.

“Dean died a happy man.” He says to the now empty room after a few moments before he informs the doctors of Dean’s death.

**Author's Note:**

> I posted this to my tumblr ages ago ;;; title from "Tears in Heaven" by Eric Clapton.


End file.
